Growing Up But Still My Baby

Today was my husband's first softball game of the season. We have many weeks ahead of dust, mosquitoes, and America's favorite pastime. Well, almost, it's just the soft version of America's favorite pastime. Actually, despite the dust and mosquitoes, it is a lot of fun. The kids and I love watching their Daddy play and afterwards, we have ice-cream. I look forward to the softball season...it's a sign that summer is here.

To get to the field where he was playing, we had to pass by the playground. It's a tough momma who can walk by a park and not let the kiddos stop and play. In fact, the sidewalk to his softball field led right though the center of the playground. So, what did we do? We stopped and played. We could see the game from the playground, so we got to watch Daddy's game and play at the same time!

I learned that my daughter can play on so many more playground activities than she could last summer. I know that this fact is only obvious since she is indeed a year older. But, my goodness, I didn't expect her to be so fearless! She wanted to try everything. Things that were intimidating to her last year were challenges to be conquered today. I was inspired by her bravery and frightened by her lack of fear! My baby girl is growing up! Look what she can do this year...

And this...

After playing for a sufficient amount of time, we walked over to the game to watch Daddy's game up close. We sat down on the bottom seat of the bleachers. I hate bleachers. They are so dangerous and make me a very nervous Momma. Since these are elevated bleachers, (I learned what they are called today) the lowest seat on these bleachers is off of the ground so there is no safe seat. During the game, my daughter was standing and talking to me and took a step back. She stepped right off of the bleachers. I reached out to her and grabbed her arm as she went down. There she was, dangling off the bleachers, hanging onto my hand for dear life. I was holding the baby in the other hand and couldn't get her up while holding onto him. Luckily, a man behind us jumped over me and pulled her back up. She was hysterical! This caused the baby to start crying too. You should have heard the noise we made, two children just howling! A woman from church offered to hold the baby while I checked for injuries. That little girl is gonna have some pretty nasty bruises on her arms and legs but other than that, she is fine. Thank goodness!

As I sat there holding her in my arms as she cried and cried, the reality hit me. Yes, she's growing up. She's getting big. She getting brave. She can climb the big kid stuff at the playground. But, she is still my baby girl. She still needs comfort and the best source of comfort for her, at that moment, was in my arms. I can only pray that my arms will always be the source of comfort that my children need no matter where life takes them and the bumps and bruises that they encounter.

After we were home from the game and the kids were in bed, I allowed myself to let go of the fear that her fall had stirred in me. I cried. I was strong for her but once she was out of earshot and the adrenalin rush was over, my body could no longer hold in the emotion. Her fall scared the living crap out of me! Tonight could have turned out so badly. It didn't. I am so grateful for that.